If Only
If only this blog was one that offered anonymity; if only I could safely recant the warped reality that is my life; if only I could tell you the stories of the past week, I promise you'd laugh. Maybe you'd be appalled for a minute, but you'd laugh at the absurdity of it all in the end. I would probably tell you about people going to jail and ridiculous drunken encounters. I'd probably tell you about adults that act like children and men that act like boys. I'd probably make lots of funny little jokes about it all and you'd all leave funny little comments. We'd all have funny little exchanges. Yep...if only....
Instead, I'll just tell you all that it's been an interesting week where others may have went to jail again and there my have been husbands and ex-husbands that acted like fools.
I've taken that "fuck you" attitude that I tend to take.
Oh..you guys don't want to help clean the house? I tell you what..there's 18 frozen dinners in the freezer. Hope you like enchiladas.
Oh...you don't have any clean clothes to wear? You've got 2 hours till bedtime and the washer's right there.
What's that? Too tired for sex? Oh, well....frozen dinners are in the freezer and the washer's right there.
I know you guys would have enjoyed a good story. Maybe I'll get around to something good tonight. Imagine, if you can, that I would actually post twice in a single day. I might do it. And if I don't and you don't like it.....Fuck you.
(See what I mean?)
posted by Holly @ 12:24 PM
13 Complaints to Management
13 Comments:
I just have to say, we know a lot of jackasses. Good thing we're perfect.
Yep. It's tough being all high-and-mighty but we still manage somehow.
heehee - we crack me up. I remember when someone called ME a jackass...ME! When I get arrested while "sleeping" in a parking lot, then we can call me a jackass, until then, it's Sister Jilleyn the Worthy and Perfect.
I haven't been on either one of your blogs since the first time I read them, but I KNEW b/c something happened in MY life that it would be the topic of conversation. HMMMMMM, how did I know I was going to be right. You two are not funny, you're fucking boring & sad. Not perfect, take a look at your houses, perfect people have perfect houses like Bree, not paths to walk through in the living room & unfinished brick sidewalks. I also remember many things that both of you have done, think back to when you were 27, that would make you "worthy" of being called a jackass. But nope you two are perfect, with perfect marriages, with perfect husbands who never LIE. Hahahahahahahaha, fuck you both. Oh & by the way Jill, I'm not even going to bother with what you've said about me on your blog, I'm sure I'll here it from "B" (you know, code name for my friend)
Oh & by the way, you're not our sister.
Ok, you know what, I had to come back into my office & re-boot my computer so that I could post this b/c I'm a little upset. See the way I see it is you have alot of stories to tell, just none where you can call me a jackass behind my back. Nope gotta call Jill for that, which you obviously already have. How about the stories like, Ummmm, my little sister just graduated from college, she's only the second person in our family to do that & I'm really proud of her, or my little sister just got a kick ass fucking raise at her kick ass job & I'm really proud of her, or my little sister just got me a job at her 2nd place of employment (which I'm also proud of her for working 2 jobs) & I really appreciate her, or my beautiful niece's (my little sis's baby) soccer team just won their tournament 2 weeks ago, or my niece dances in her first recital in 3 weeks. Shit even if you wanted a funny story, tell your loser friends that I made out with Billy Idol last week & got a signed drumstick, or that I dance like a fool at the bar we work at to make the crowd laugh & get hella tips. But no, you just wanna tell stories that make me sound like a fool & make me worthy of being called a dumbass. But whatever, I still love you, I'm just not sure I like you.
...really you've gone too far when you've insulted my sidewalk.
I mean....it's cobblestone....it's supposed to look unfinished. sniff,sniff
Your wife must be rubbing off on you, I think you must feel like you're perfect too. I mean afterall you corrected my one typo. I mean look at the big brain on Brad, holy shit!! I'm sure that since you corrected me, then you know what I meant to type. And by the way I'm not dragging you into anything, I wasn't even aware that you read Holly's journal, and if you were asking nicely, then you wouldn't have attempted to insult me by insinuating that I didn't know how to spell hear, as in hear it from my friend. So whatever Jay, you're just as bad as your wife.
Damn....I bet Site-meter is going nuts trying to keep up with all my traffic.
#1...I didn't say anything bad about you here. I expected that you'd call me on it if I did. But I didn't.
#2...Jill doesn't really think we're perfect. It was a sarcastic remark.
#3...I did not call you a jackass behind your back.
#4...I will have no misspelled words on my site..Jay, or otherwise...so try to keep up on that one.
#5...Get over it, girl. Nobody hates you. Why are you so insecure over this shit that you HAVE to check my blog to see if I've said anything. And what the hell does it matter if I did. I love you, Annie, it's just that this is MY SPACE. I don't have to talk about everyone's good stuff. The people that read here that know you, already know what good things that you've done. (Which was 2 until you did this last time and got entire corporate entities checking in.) The rest of my readers are mindless fools..I mean, really, you guys keep coming back :)...that don't give a FUCK about you.
#6...That sidewalk thing...that was a little low.
Peace and Love to All.
Holly, anything on the internet is not your space, it's whoever has the desire to get on & read it.
Annie:
Seriously, it took you 10 days to come up with that? It is space on the internet that I've secured as my own to write whatever the fuck I want to write. I didn't say it was private or secret or anything else. If you read that in context, you will find that my point is that I don't have to talk good about you or anyone else.
That's why it's my space. If you can't write anything here unless I allow it and niether can anyone else, I guess that's what it is.
Duh!!!! :)
Good Lord, I was just fucking with you.
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