A Great Man Once Said: (and I quote) "Bring On the Heat. Bring On the Babbling Bitches."

I know there's another day left in this holiday weekend, but I'm officially calling it quits today. My head is still pounding, and that's the least of my pains right now.
It was a pretty good weekend, all said and done. No children. Lots of alcohol. Funny boys. Blow-up dolls. Rosy crotches. Donkey punches. Unadulterated references to anal sex. Completely unintelligent conversation. And that was just Friday night.

Just a note of advice: Don't ever depend on Blog Jesus to take care of your hangover. He laid out a plan that sounded pretty good. I blissfully consumed alcohol at a more-than-moderate clip, knowing that I could just heed the advice of Mr. Omnipotence, himself. Now all I have is a hangover and a parrot that keeps squawking some shit about, "That's whatcha get for bein' a babbling bitch."